Expectations, means, and variances ...

Exams are finally over. And so is the silence of this blog.

I have had these conversations with people, where they tell me that we should not expect a lot from others, cause it doesn't do any good to us. It puts pressure on the person being 'expected from', and we risk getting hurt in case our expectations aren't met. Keep things easy, and life will roll on smoothly. Ignorance is bliss.

[south indian accent] What rubbish I say! Expectations are a part and parcel of life. We invariably come to expect so many things from so many people around us. We expect the milkman to come on time, we expect the cobbler to not make a mess of our shoes, we expect the vegetable vendor to show us exactly where the fresh vegetables are kept when we ask him ... Is it then so wrong to expect a little more from our friends?

Maybe people look at it in a wrong way. The word 'expectation' itself is a bit negative, let me suggest a better word for it. How about, say, 'trust'? The more you trust someone, the more you come to expect from the person. It's natural, it's reflexive. I believe if we find ourselves expecting a lot from someone, it's probably because we trust that person. And the more we like the person. more trust naturally goes into the relationship, leading to more expectations. There's no escaping this simple fact.

What does this mean to the person who is being trusted? It is only justified that we look into the other side as well. I say, enjoy it! So many people long for someone to trust them. Remember, if you find someone who expects a lot from you, it's probably the trust showing. Congratulations, you may have just found a good friend. Or a stalker. Whatever. Anyway, sometimes, we know we can't live up to the expectations of others. But most of those times, it's not the 'living-up-to' that matters, it's the 'trying' that matters. And if the other person is really a good friend, you will be understood.

I know some people probably won't agree with me. That's all right though, I don't mind. I don't 'expect' everyone to.

I am thinking quite a lot about this, more stuff will probably show up in the future.

How deep does this hole go?

Just when you thought the hole couldn't go any deeper ... it turns into a bottomless pit, leaving you helpless as you fall into nothingness.

New feature added

Ok, I am in trouble.

Barely nine days to our exams, and I spent over five hours today trying to get the 'read / unread' feature going. Try it for yourself ! You can mark some of my messages as read or unread, and they will be either hidden or shown accordingly. Saves a lot of screen space, don't you think ?? And you only see the posts you haven't yet seen !!

Play with it - and tell me if you see any problems. But I don't think I'll be able to fix it immediately ...

Best 'o luck !!

Typical study routine

... lie down ... pick up a book ... read two paragraphs ... get bored ... switch subjects ... read few more lines ... doze off ... get up, sit on the chair ... put on the computer ... headphones ... swing with the beats ... oh yes, read ... one more page ... continue ... until ... a really good song comes along ... increase the volume ... sing along ... hunt for more songs ... line up your favorite songs in the playlist ... wait for the *really good* songs ... oh yes, read ... listen to a few more songs ... suddenly realize the time ... curse yourself ... put away the songs ... turn off the computer ... lie down ...

God save me.

Bush on the rampage

Damn !! Bush is winning. Not that I have anything against him. I am not even a Kerry supporter. I am least bothered about American politics, their policies will continue to SUCK no matter who is there at the top.

But it feels so nice to root for the supposed underdog, doesn't it? Why do we like the David and Goliath story? Because we like the notion of people overcoming difficulties, no matter how large they are. We all like to believe we'll succeed against all odds. Bollywood thrives on it - it's the quintessential Bollywood hero theme. Leaders (religious / political / social) also milk people using the concept of hope.

Hope. That's the word that keeps us going. It keeps the world ticking. If it weren't for hope, we wouldn't have the light bulb, or the telephone, or any of these things that we see around us. Damn, we wouldn't even be a free country, if our leaders wouldn't hope for it.


At least, hope is what I think is keeping ME going these days. I am lagging way behind in my studies ... but ... hum honge kamayab. Wish me luck, people. And best of luck to you too - in whatever it is that you are doing.

PS : Kerry was not an underdog, really. But I do believe the odds were stacked against him. American history has shown that a President usually gets re-elected for a second term. And if I were an American, I would probably have voted for Bush too. No one likes to change leadership at difficult times, unless you are sure the new leader is REALLY going to lead you out of trouble. And most Americans feel these are times of trouble for them. They should have a look at what their government has done to other countries.

Happy Halloween !!

Happy Halloween to everyone !!

Hopefully, u didn't waste your whole day watching the Simpson's Halloween specials ... like me (!)

Picture of You

Didn't they say that I would make a mistake

Didn't they say you were gonna be trouble

People told me you were too much to take

I could see it, but I didn't wanna know

I let you in and you let me down

You messed me up and you turned my whole life around

Left me feel that I had no where to go

I was alone, how was I too know that



You'll be there, when I needed somebody

You'll be there, the only one who can help me



I had a picture of you in my mind

Never knew it could be so wrong

Why'd it take me so long just to find

The friend that was there all along



Who'd believe that after all we've been through

I'd be able to put my whole trust in you

Goes to show you can't forgive and forget

Looking back, I have no regrets cause



You'll be there, when I needed somebody

You'll be there, the only one to help me



...

...



[ Boyzone - Picture of You ]

Osama is back !!!

Osama is back to haunt America. And perhaps with intentions in mind. Not only has he repeated his rhetoric in his latest appearance, he has also commented on the political situation. This being election time, there is little doubt that his speech might have an effect on the outcome of these elections. I don't know which candidate is going to be affected and in what way, but I am sure political analysts are burning their midnight oil over this.

Some good words from Linus Torvalds ...

Nobody should start to undertake a large project. You start with a small _trivial_ project, and you should never expect it to get large. If you do, you'll just overdesign and generally think it is more important than it likely is at that stage. Or worse, you might be scared away by the sheer size of the work you envision.

So start small, and think about the details. Don't think about some big picture and fancy design. If it doesn't solve some fairly immediate need, it's almost certainly over-designed. And don't expect people to jump in and help you. That's not how these things work. You need to get something half-way _useful_ first, and then others will say "hey, that _almost_ works for me", and they'll get involved in the project.

And if there is anything I've learnt from Linux, it's that projects have a life of their own, and you should _not_ try to enforce your "vision" too strongly on them. Most often you're wrong anyway, and if you're not flexible and willing to take input from others (and willing to change direction when it turned out your vision was flawed), you'll never get anything good done.

In other words, be willing to admit your mistakes, and don't expect to get anywhere big in any kind of short timeframe. I've been doing Linux for thirteen years, and I expect to do it for quite some time still. If I had _expected_ to do something that big, I'd never have started. It started out small and insignificant, and that's how I thought about it.

What is life ... continued ...

Someone made a comment on my earlier post, here's something that'll make him think.

Do we only exist at the physical level? If this is all there is to our existence, why do we think about it? What is it that makes us sentient? What is it that seems to live two or three inches behind our eyes and that looks out into the world? Why do we exist?
Without getting too philosophical [Sidd :)], we can reasonably assume that chemistry, maths or physics dont define our existence completely. Can chemical compounds love each other? Can they feel sad? Happy? Can they grieve when other chemical reactions have run their course? Can they wonder where they came from and where they will go? Can they "live"?

Eh, Pascal??